Letstoriesunfold ™

  It's 11:18, I'm yet to sleep.  Earlier, hapo 6 or 7 pm, jirani karibu animalize na Dojo Maber, playing it over and over again, karibu I head over there, knock on their door, and tell them, hata kama ni kupenda wimbo aje, imetosha sasa.  But ni kama alijua or alisense before niende nimbishie, akachange playlist, akaamua sasa ni ngoma za Sauti Sol back to back. As I'm writing this, ni Insecure by Sauti Sol playing, ma baddies wakising along this part at the top of their voices,  Chini ya maji, si ni machizi Twachunguzana kipolisi And your body is a movie And I hope you feel the same But you're insecure (eeeeeh) Oh my you're insecure (aaaaaah) Oh my you're insecure (eeeeeh) And I'm insecure (aaaaaah) Before like an hour before, nilikuwa niko 50/50, scratch that, nilikuwa nimebakisha kidogo ni gate crush, ju naskia masauti nyororo, niko zile za damn it!  Si nivuke kwa jirani?  Kumbe this is how Fomo feels like? Such a nasty, nasty feeling! Inafanya hadi nakaa...

  Lemme tell y'all something I discovered, fixing shit unlocks a good feeling in you.  A little backstory, niko kejani nimechill napanga venye siku ya kesho itakuwa. It's around 9/10 pm hapo, niko ndani ya duvet, hii baridi ni mbaya, but I'm kind of happy one ni ju Manchester imenyoroshwa, na Kenya imeweza kuingia quarter finals za Chan. Niko easy, scrolling through, checking emails, sending CVs, na proposals hapa na pale, yenye itanasa ya kwanza. Hii story ya kutafuta shillingi, eeeei inatumaliza! Nimejiambia, wacha ni scroll simu kidogo, kabla usingizi ikuje, nilale kidogo, before usingizi ipotee hapo saa name, tisa, ju ya mawazo ya venye maisha yangu imestagnate, inakuja kukuja. Kiasi kiasi, nastukia niko kwa giza!  Niko zile za Kplc hao, wameanua stima. Naamua nitoke kwa bed, niende ni connect simu kwa charger, ndio ile time stima itarudi, nitaamka asubuhi nipate simu ikiwa full charge. Nikiplug simu hivi, naona, charging. Nikajijazia kumbe ni bulb imeungua. Kuchungul...

By the way, nishawahi pendwa na wazimu wasee . Not toxic like how some of your partners in some of your relationships are, just somebody's daughter who was mentally ill. Tulieni niwapee story how it all went down. I was coming from Murang'a , nilikuwa nimetoka huko kupiga shughuli mbili tatu, as you know kwa gari kuna wale watu hubebwa mid journey, so sisi hao, tuko Kenol , gari imesimama watu kadhaa wakashuka, conductor yuko nje anaita watu wengine waiingie kwa gari to fill the empty seats.  I have my awesome earphones on, nasikia kuna fracas outside but I mind my shit so I ignore it, ju the last time niliona mtu ameleta kiherehere kwa shughuli haikuwa yake, alistukia amepigwa Kofi , mate ikatoka na curve kama shot ya Messi in his prime. Suddenly, I look up, and a fine gal catches the edge of my sight, eye contact kiasi between me and her and she smiles.  Damn a fine gal like this one? Thank you God! I remove my earphones so I can see her well. I songa songa as she comes an...

              In my existence, I have noticed some people are eating life with a big spoon, others like me, life is eating us with big spoons (read spade).  Not so many moons ago I was in a very bad fix, big brain, alot of skills but no paper evidence to match the skill so the people with money think you are a con. Anyway, I had a friend who was a donda (read conductor), I know he makes over 1500 daily because one day he told me, I asked him to link me up to one of the manyangas and he told me, “Si rahisi ni kulink  mimi stakudanganya kama wale uncle wa nyumbani  ati maliza shule nitakueka mahali.”  So he told me about kamagera ( a person who just loads people in a Matatu , and remains.) and their rowdiness. That their survival in nairobi is to be likened to the silverback against 100 men. No mercy. Nikamuuliza, because I want a fishing rod, not the fish itself so as to fend for myself.  So akaniambia you just go to any st...

          Something just popped into my mind, that made me chuckle just a bit. No, it's not the fact that Manchester lost, and they way their fans were hyped that they would win the game. There is a particular screenshot I saw somewhere, while I was scrolling maybe on X (Twitter), or on someone's WhatsApp status. Let me paint for you like I'm Leonardo Da Vinci, on how the conversation was.  It all started out with the usual nitty gritties, asking about each other's day, the lady asked what someone's son has been upto.  Someone's daughter was eagerly beseeching someone's son to come over to her place as soon as the guy told her, he was just chilling.  I saw that conversation, and was impressed by the sheer amount of effort she was applying. She goes ahead and invites the guy over, the guy at first says he does not have fare, the lady even offers to send him fare, the guy says he will come the following day, the lady offers a movie night, the guy cl...