Stories from the banking hall

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  People out here are angry, really angry. I know this is no way to start a story, but relax it's heading somewhere, I promise. It's a chilly morning and I'm at a bank waiting for my turn to be served, service yao ilikuwa imeanza kusumbua from Monday, but hey, that's a story for another time. I could feel like I was a bit out of place, you know? because the last time I remember I was in a bank was many years ago, when I was on campus, paying for my fees. Mzazi aliniamia bana, alijua ningepata guts, temptations za kukula fee ingekam, ningejua venye ningeilipa. So where was I?  Oh yes, there is this guy who is seated like 2 or three seats away from me, bigger and older than me from the looks of it, looks like a business man, or in lay man terms jamaa wa madeals. After a few minutes waiting, he starts getting impatient, and frustrated so he starts complaining, why is the service taking so long, can't they go a little faster, and so on and so forth.  I'm seated ther...
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Ni mbayaa!

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               It was one of those days, there I was chilling after some hectic shughuli, just trying to catch my breath, nangoja mat ijae itoke stage nifike mtaa. I spot this girl amekaa kando yangu holding a water bottle, and it was like ¾ full. I was feeling a little thirsty, ok, maybe more than a little. 


I say hi to her, Namsho design jua imenikaranga kama mimi ni kitunguu, na venye naskia ulimi imekauka, wacha tu. Si mnaelewa hii joto imekuwa recently? I go ahead and ask her if she would mind giving me a sip of her water?  It seems to me like she doesn't mind my request, because she passes her water bottle over to me. I'm like, I can finally quench my thirst. I take one big sip, and immediately regret it… aiyo! 


My tongue is like sandpaper. Naenda kutema, naona kanjo ndio huyo, ananingoja niteme tu hivi, ashuke, na ashine na mimi proper! Inabidi tu nimemeza shingo upande. Ikiteremka naskia ni kama my throat is hosting a barbecue, and my brain is screaming at me like


“Hii ni changaa, 

hiding in plain sight?” 


After nimerudishia dame water bottle yake, I sat there, nimefreeze, nashangaa, 




“Kwani, 

hii ni ile changaa ya wapi?”


Wacha mat ijae, itoke CBD, ishike highway, ndio naskia effects za hio sip zinakam in full force. Eeei! I could feel it cooking in me, niliiskia inachoma hadi kwa maini, naskia hadi kwa loop of Henle, inafeel ni kama Ghost rider amepita hapo. I'm telling you, it was flames, fire, chaos… Siet! 


And the girl? 


You should have seen her. She was just there, her face a picture of innocence, smiling like nothing has happened, holding her water bottle like a boss. 


Me? 

I was still thirsty, recovering from that sip, karibu inipige knockout. I'm there whispering to myself, 


“Next time, beba maji yako bana… 

kunywa maji yako tu.”

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Is a pleasure to keep you as my reader entertained. Peace✌️

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