Butwaa! 2

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Any mlevi reading this knows that hio mkojo ndio ime hold back kuzima ziii. So Liz takes her to a nearby washroom, and when she comes back, her legs seem to have forgotten their function, you know, like holding the body weight and supporting locomotion. Miguu zake ziko jelly jelly. So she just says,  "ebu mnishikilie kiasi"  That, my friends, was the last time I saw her standing. Her eyes shut, her mouth failed the speaking test, and she just fell into our hands. Visiting hours zimeisha, amevaa uniform, tuko in a location civilian hawafai kukuwa. Trouble was brewing like the water we just drank. We tell Liz juu pia yeye ako na uniform aende akuje na help as we try to make her vomit and pour water on her. Waapi!  Liz alienda na simu yake and the clothes we had brought. Mpaka leo 11 years later hajawai rudi. We are there for 30 mins and catch the radar: civilians on government land. A whistle is blown, and close to 40 officers are on scene in a minute. Zilishuka mpaka nikak...
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Ni mbayaa!

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               It was one of those days, there I was chilling after some hectic shughuli, just trying to catch my breath, nangoja mat ijae itoke stage nifike mtaa. I spot this girl amekaa kando yangu holding a water bottle, and it was like ¾ full. I was feeling a little thirsty, ok, maybe more than a little. 


I say hi to her, Namsho design jua imenikaranga kama mimi ni kitunguu, na venye naskia ulimi imekauka, wacha tu. Si mnaelewa hii joto imekuwa recently? I go ahead and ask her if she would mind giving me a sip of her water?  It seems to me like she doesn't mind my request, because she passes her water bottle over to me. I'm like, I can finally quench my thirst. I take one big sip, and immediately regret it… aiyo! 


My tongue is like sandpaper. Naenda kutema, naona kanjo ndio huyo, ananingoja niteme tu hivi, ashuke, na ashine na mimi proper! Inabidi tu nimemeza shingo upande. Ikiteremka naskia ni kama my throat is hosting a barbecue, and my brain is screaming at me like


“Hii ni changaa, 

hiding in plain sight?” 


After nimerudishia dame water bottle yake, I sat there, nimefreeze, nashangaa, 




“Kwani, 

hii ni ile changaa ya wapi?”


Wacha mat ijae, itoke CBD, ishike highway, ndio naskia effects za hio sip zinakam in full force. Eeei! I could feel it cooking in me, niliiskia inachoma hadi kwa maini, naskia hadi kwa loop of Henle, inafeel ni kama Ghost rider amepita hapo. I'm telling you, it was flames, fire, chaos… Siet! 


And the girl? 


You should have seen her. She was just there, her face a picture of innocence, smiling like nothing has happened, holding her water bottle like a boss. 


Me? 

I was still thirsty, recovering from that sip, karibu inipige knockout. I'm there whispering to myself, 


“Next time, beba maji yako bana… 

kunywa maji yako tu.”

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Is a pleasure to keep you as my reader entertained. Peace✌️

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