Stories from the banking hall

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  People out here are angry, really angry. I know this is no way to start a story, but relax it's heading somewhere, I promise. It's a chilly morning and I'm at a bank waiting for my turn to be served, service yao ilikuwa imeanza kusumbua from Monday, but hey, that's a story for another time. I could feel like I was a bit out of place, you know? because the last time I remember I was in a bank was many years ago, when I was on campus, paying for my fees. Mzazi aliniamia bana, alijua ningepata guts, temptations za kukula fee ingekam, ningejua venye ningeilipa. So where was I?  Oh yes, there is this guy who is seated like 2 or three seats away from me, bigger and older than me from the looks of it, looks like a business man, or in lay man terms jamaa wa madeals. After a few minutes waiting, he starts getting impatient, and frustrated so he starts complaining, why is the service taking so long, can't they go a little faster, and so on and so forth.  I'm seated ther...

Butwaa!

  


Having friends is great, having stupid friends is better 

having diabolical friends?

even crazier. 



              Today I will beat for you hekaya of one of my many bad choices. So Kenya Prisons training takes nine months and there is a mid training visiting and the final graduation known as pass out where the prezo or their mkubwa comes to make lies for promises. 


I have a friend called Daudi, who has a girlfriend called Abby, she was the one graduating. Abby has a best friend, Salma, Daudi has a cousin, Daniel, then kuna yours truly. Abby invited Daudi, and Salma. Daudi goes ahead and invites yours truly and Dan.


We contacted and met Daudi in tao. We are to meet Salma since hatujuani twende pamoja. My main role in this visit was to prevent the boy from throwing himself in the road and connect to Sayuni, that is if apate serekali imebadilishwa, if you get what I mean. Also to suggest good poisons(liquor), in case things get so ugly. Seriously though, my role was to keep the boy occupied as the family converse na huko. 


Anyway, the recruit aliitisha mzinga, we decided since amekaa sana bila kulewa, something 30% is not too hard or too harsh to a former liquor connoisseur. We KC lemon Ginger our way into the camp. The family is congratulating and praising the graduate as I happily feasted on the delicious soft meat that they brought. 


Honestly, sikuwa nasikia anything that was said. The meat was too good. Nikaweka chapo tatu kwa mkoba za kukula on my way back to Nrb. The sherehe ends and the "friends" take charge. The mzinga is shared in tumblers among the 5 people and in a flash. Tunaona made in kenya pande ya chini. 


 “Officer ako na pesa, 

nani ataendea ingine apo nje?”


Abby boldly says. She was in her uniform so she can't leave the compound. Sophie alikua amekuja na mtoi, around 4/5 yrs, alikuwa amembebea nguo in those little pink kids bags. Dan alikuwa the likely person wa kuendea. Dan kuangalia angalia atabebea nini, akaona bag ya mtoi akasema pesa atumiwe akiendea.


Mzinga ilikuja ikiwa imewekwa ndani ya bag ya mtoi na mtoi amebebwa. That is how we smuggled liquor into a training camp. MARUFUKU as they call anything illegal. Let the party continue ama namna gani my friends. Hakuna chaser all along msisahau. Abby was seated kwa nyasi. Tulikuwa tumechill kwa shooting range imbibing liquor. 


Tukipea askari jela pombe in their home ground. So a few shots later mzinga mbili zikaisha. She had called her training friend Liz tupige shots. So tukakuwa like 6 people there.


She stands up and her legs still function. Or so I thought. We are saying congrats laughing, a few banters here and there and then she says she needs to pee... 


Makosa


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