INSECURE

                 As I am writing this naskia masikio inakuwa moto ju ya hasira. Self control inashikiliwa na just a thread, nisikute that individual na panga niifanye shwaa shwaa shwaa, ka Samurai Jack. Najua mnashangaa mbona your storyteller amejaa ngori hivi, a certain individual, tuliagree nimpigie ma one two, nikatimiza, sasa kumpigia naskia mteja wa nambari uliyopiga hapatikani kwa sasa!  

I'm livid, nashangaa rada hapa ni gani? In my mind, najaribu kuangalia mbona the individual yuko mteja from all perceptives, labda simu imezima, or imepotea, or pahali yuko hakuna network ndio call haingii, lakini the funny thing is there's a voice at the back of my head going hapanaaa! hapanaaa! hapanaa! 

Anyway, I give the individual time, perhaps they will get back to me, explain to me why my calls to them were not going through you know? Naenda napiga shughuli mbili tatu, try to keep my mind occupied. Kuna this fear in another part of my mind inaweka mbele that the individual anaweza kuwa amenifanyisha PE (this is what the layman in the Queen's language calls take one for a fool.). 

Then as I'm contemplating if I'm in a denial or not, naskia someone is knocking on my door. I'm not expecting company, so nashangaa who could that be, maybe jirani wants to borrow something, or plug me kwa shughuli. Naenda nafungua, napata ni mtu wa rangi, anastuka kiasi, then ananisho nimetumwa nipake rangi this house no. Nikiangalia the house no, is my house no.

A few minutes pass where we are both genuinely confused. Then ananiambia alikuwa anadhani atakuta nyumba ikiwa vacant apige kazi, amestuka akiona nyumba iko na mtu. Namwambia labda mwenye nyumba alikosea or something, mtu wa rangi just shrugs ju hajui nini ingine atasema then leaves. Now I am left puzzled, asking myself hii ni mchezo gani like is it just a simple mistake or is it that mwenye nyumba is borrowing a page from the wahengas?

I get back inside, mimi huyo ndani ya duvet, I want to write about how Kenya encourages you to be an atheist, as I'm thinking on how to structure it, someone calls me, we talk, and by the time the call is done, usingizi is telling me kuja hapa, usiresist. Then I plug my phone to charge, then I answer back to usingizi, nguvu ya kuresist natoa wapi? Twende to slumberland.

I've woken up kupitia this story to make sure it flows, and it's epic, and I've realized that the initial anger has subsided. Kumbe ndio maana watu huambiwa sleep on it, wakiwa na pressing issue at hand.