Shimonjero

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  You know those times unasikia ni kama unachizi? Umepanga vitu zako vizuri, from A-Z then everything decides to go tits up kama mende imededi? So recently I was in such a bubble, naona tu Dim.  Nikasema sitachizi niliona, wacha I go see my hombre, Tommie, pale Kach. It's very peaceful place btw. After the first day, we are beating stories after kumaliza shughuli mbili tatu, nothing major, just enough to feel productive without actually being productive.  Out of nowhere, Tommie leans in like he’s about to reveal state secrets. “Btw nilikuwa na mpango na fulani na yule jirani  nilikuwa nataka tupangane.  Si tufike hivyo?” We pull up to Jirani's compound, and the first thing we see? Two cocks. Full chest out. Feathers flying. Pride on the line. These roosters were not playing. This wasn’t a disagreement, this was generational beef. You could tell one of them had been waiting for this moment since childhood. Jamaa sees us and instead of greeting like a normal human...
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Locked up

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 They won’t let me out

They won’t let me out (oh, I’m locked up)

They won’t let me out, no

They won’t let me out (my nigga, I’m locked up)

They won’t let me out

They won’t let me out (oh, oh, oh, yeah, I’m locked up)

They won’t let me out, no

They won’t let me out

This part of the song by Akon starts our story adventure for today.

As Fabrizio Romano always says, 

here we go!

There was a time I was the Bruce lee in this cold concrete jungle. I had so much strength, techniques, and moves I could knock down three men in a flash, this was until I messed with the wrong kind.

The story starts at Westlands, the year is 2020 - Covid-19 period. I was on my old wobbly motorcycle at my normal corner waiting for some rich girl tuende arboretum, you can guess what people do there especially on a Sunday with a girl whose limited time you've got. 

Your guess is as good as mine

So I was charged and waiting for her, only this time around, she didn’t come by alone, she came with her brothers and the brother's friend. 

I was charged fueled by adrenaline plus anticipation of what lay ahead, I just couldn't let the opportunity pass just like that so when they flatly refused for me to go with their sister, I got mad angry.

An ugly war started, a charged man wanting to please a rich beauty versus two brothers plus another potential suitor-their friend, who wanted to show the girl how protective they are of her. 



Fists started flying by shortly afterwards. Well, they were no match for me, I didn’t attend Githurai gyms and taekwondo/boxing street lessons for nothing. In that scenario, Jason Statham would wipe a tear off his eyes and be proud.

I am human after all so I tried not to bruise the rich boys too much. In fact, all I wanted to do was just leave the fight and just go. As I was about to leave, the bigger brother smashed my motorcycle headlight with a kick. 

A kick on my balls could have been better, 

I went mad, raving mad.

There’s one thing that I hate is someone messing with shit I own, it unlocks an ugly side of me even the devil himself is afraid to steal a sneak peek. 

I swept the brother so hard he turned 180 degrees and landed upside down, head first, As I turned to start the bike, I only saw a black object getting closer and closer to my face, 

kumbe,

hizi areas za the rich, 

ma watchie wako everywhere bana

hadi kwa barabara.

Nilijipata tu niko parklands police station, kichwa inagonga kugonga kama kamagera kwa mabati ya mat. Nilikuwa nimerushwa kwa cell amidst the drunk, stinking, and rough looking fellas looking at me, sizing me up na hivyo ndio nililala ndani weekend mzima. 

Monday ikafika na ikanipata nikiwa nimepelekwa court, the judge looked at me with pure hatred. Mimi huyo kizimbani, nikakataa mashtaka nikawekwa ndani 21 days, no bail.

Should I go on, tell you guys about life in remand ama niachie hapo, I don’t want you guys knowing about how I was about to get anally raped. 

 😂😂😂

Story by 

Drumroll please

🥁

Arafat


#Letstoriesunfold™

Comments

  1. UnknownSeptember 9, 2022 at 6:20 AM

    Beautiful

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousSeptember 9, 2022 at 8:33 AM

    Oh yeah once, hapo Mama ngina waterfront garden, Mombasa. Makosa was hugging some one of the opposite sex while in the garden. Tulishikwa wakasema we we're making love in public🥺😏. I cried coz twaz my first time ending in a cell and was to travel back to Nairobi the next day. Coz ya kulia walisema aty I was drunk. Anyway walikula 2k nkaachiliwa around 9.

    ReplyDelete

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Is a pleasure to keep you as my reader entertained. Peace✌️

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