Nรฒรฎ

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On another episode of: things that never happened, or did they? Saturday or Sunday, many many many moons ago. I used to go to the bafu na towel pekee always wondering how women always walked around in skirts. So after showering it was free mode mpaka kejani. Kwa buloti, it was a communal bathroom so you had to carry your bucket. Na ukipata mtu yuko ndani, unapanga laini. On this particular day nilikuwa nimechemsha maji niko ready kuingia kwa bafu, jirani beat me to the bathroom by seconds. I left my bucket full of warm water hapo nikiwa frustrated then nikaingia kejani kutime akitoka, naruka ndani. Asubuhi gets chilly so you can't just hang around there waiting ukiwa kifua iko nje, umejifunga towel pekee. Akamaliza nikaskia mlango yake imefunga, nikakimbia bafu fasta fasta maji yangu isipoe, ingepoa ingekuwa balaa. Kumbe she was not yet done, alikua ameacha karai yake na maji hapo ndani arudi kuosha kifuniko. Mimi naye nokatoa hio basin nje nikaingia kwa bafu, this is not ...

Visanga za Ambrose.


His office phone and mobile rang almost simultaneously from security guards. He decided to pick up the mobile call first. 

“Boss, 
bibi yako alikuja na wamama kumi, 
wakaingia kwa..." 

The call dropped. The office line rang again.

“Kuna mgeni anasema ni bibi yako,” 

Makori at the gate said. The chairman needed clarification. He told Makori, the guard he never got along with,

“tell her to call me,” 

The house girl called. She had been chased from home by the evil woman and a battalion of women in choir uniform. She was also worried that she couldn't locate her periods either.

The Lady HR was in cahoots with guards to gather intel on who came late and who left early, to reward them accordingly. Makori, her chief snitch, reported about the distressed wife of the Man of God, Ambrose. 




Excited about potential breaking news, she rushed to receive her. Ambrose called the home guard first to get the full incident. 

“Bibi yako, 
amekuja na wamama wa kanisa, 
akafukuza ule mtu wako.” 

They came armed with new utensils, bathroom accessories, and bedding. The master bathroom looked like a rally: colorful yellow, red, green, and orange flags.

He heard they were praying and cleansing the house, his house. First, he chose to deal with matters arising at work. He went to the gate to meet the alleged wife. As he got to the reception, a familiar voice called him out, 

“Hi Ambrose”

It was the HR lady who was seated next to his house girl, who was now sobbing. She said excitedly, with a wicked smile, 

“I didn't know your family has grown. 
You are really a performer, 
on and off work. 
You are indeed a model employee,” 

she hissed. The chairman, Man of God, was lost for words and he lost his balance.

Comments

  1. Mi naona uandike kitu full ndio upost ๐ŸฅฑMambo ya episodes ni ngumu

    ReplyDelete
  2. Totally sth that needs to be completed bana๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ˜ฉ

    ReplyDelete
  3. sarcastic you perfome both on and out of work the episode is amazing

    ReplyDelete

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