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Showing posts from May, 2023

Waswa

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 In my days of service I had this friend called Waswa. He was way older than me, like 3 years older but tulikua tume enlist na yeye and we found ourselves sharing a barrack cube. Tulikua 4 in 1 cube. One night while we were off duty, he told me why he joined the military. Waswa was in JKUAT, Juja campus, and he was having some sort of entanglement with his schoolmate, a pretty petite lass called Syombua.  Our boy Waswa was the one visiting her because he was in a shared hostel. Waswa’s pretty lass, Syombua, lived in Weiteithie, in a well furnished apartment. Their relationship was like 3 or 4 months old but Waswa had received all sorts of treatment. From slices to the other slices, I know you know, and if you don't, jokes on you.  Kijana in his mind assumed that the lady came from a seriously loaded family. Makosaa. Sasa one Friday Waswa as usual goes for a sleepover knowing atakula vizuri pande zote. They enjoy the night and netflix as usual until they heard, “Fungua hap...

Tales of the city

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 Several years ago I used to live in the further east part of Nyairofi, where problems and life challenges first gather every morning before spreading to other parts of the city. Back then, life had beaten me m-stick completely, and I literally used to live hand to nose to mouth. If it smelled good, it could be eaten. At that time, i used to do jobs of all collars, from white, blue and even black collar.  I used to have a banner in my house written wìra nì wìra  (work is work). One day I was called for an interview somewhere in Westlands, and told to be there by 7.30 am. The reason is because I knew someone who knew someone who knew the manager there. I had been instructed o go very early so that I could be given some heads up on what to expect in the interview. As most of you know traffic jam is rampant in the mornings and because of that, I had to leave home very early, around 5am.  So on that day, I woke up and got myself ready. I took my documents and left the ho...

Eloi eloi namna gani?

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 A day like this many years ago was the start of a sequence of events that almost made me seek traditional means to resolve my issues. I went home that evening and found my door yawning, with the house empty. Thugs had broken in and stolen everything valuable from electronics to any good clothes they would find. For the record, when it comes to my graduation photos, I am in the same whatsapp group with the likes of Waititu and my friend Sakaja.  I don’t have any coz I had stored them in my laptop and backed them up in the hard disk and both were stolen. Back then cloud storage and WiFi connection were luxuries. I’m very old btw. They even had the guts to eat some kienyeji chicken that I had left marinating, cooked ugali and left dirty dishes.  That was a hint that apart from being thieves, they were also fangi smokers. The only important asset they left behind was the bed, which was also broken. I did not really understand or know what activities had happened in my house,...

Baby mama.

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I had just bailed out one of my Gs, yobiz, out of the government “air bnb.” If you know you know, if you don't, well you can forget about it. The way he kept thanking me after I had got him out, if I was a lady, I could have died from that overdose of appreciation and attention, but hey, who am I to talk.  Anyway, I just had to laugh at him at how silly he looked. He looked disheveled, with just one croc on his foot, his socks muddy, and his t-shirt stretched like that of a lactating mother. He was still paranoid of his surroundings and he was adamant to tell me how it all went down on the way, till we reached his place he said that's when and where he will tell me.  I didn't push it, so we continued on our way so that he could tell me the story and hopefully we could brainstorm on some other important issues like, how are we going to negotiate with clients in order to clinch the next deal? I waited until he freshened up, then got some coffee in him first before I then aske...