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Showing posts from May, 2023

Mapenzi crazy!

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By the way, nishawahi pendwa na wazimu wasee . Not toxic like how some of your partners in some of your relationships are, just somebody's daughter who was mentally ill. Tulieni niwapee story how it all went down. I was coming from Murang'a , nilikuwa nimetoka huko kupiga shughuli mbili tatu, as you know kwa gari kuna wale watu hubebwa mid journey, so sisi hao, tuko Kenol , gari imesimama watu kadhaa wakashuka, conductor yuko nje anaita watu wengine waiingie kwa gari to fill the empty seats.  I have my awesome earphones on, nasikia kuna fracas outside but I mind my shit so I ignore it, ju the last time niliona mtu ameleta kiherehere kwa shughuli haikuwa yake, alistukia amepigwa Kofi , mate ikatoka na curve kama shot ya Messi in his prime. Suddenly, I look up, and a fine gal catches the edge of my sight, eye contact kiasi between me and her and she smiles.  Damn a fine gal like this one? Thank you God! I remove my earphones so I can see her well. I songa songa as she comes an...

Tales of the city

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 Several years ago I used to live in the further east part of Nyairofi, where problems and life challenges first gather every morning before spreading to other parts of the city. Back then, life had beaten me m-stick completely, and I literally used to live hand to nose to mouth. If it smelled good, it could be eaten. At that time, i used to do jobs of all collars, from white, blue and even black collar.  I used to have a banner in my house written wìra nì wìra  (work is work). One day I was called for an interview somewhere in Westlands, and told to be there by 7.30 am. The reason is because I knew someone who knew someone who knew the manager there. I had been instructed o go very early so that I could be given some heads up on what to expect in the interview. As most of you know traffic jam is rampant in the mornings and because of that, I had to leave home very early, around 5am.  So on that day, I woke up and got myself ready. I took my documents and left the ho...

Eloi eloi namna gani?

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 A day like this many years ago was the start of a sequence of events that almost made me seek traditional means to resolve my issues. I went home that evening and found my door yawning, with the house empty. Thugs had broken in and stolen everything valuable from electronics to any good clothes they would find. For the record, when it comes to my graduation photos, I am in the same whatsapp group with the likes of Waititu and my friend Sakaja.  I don’t have any coz I had stored them in my laptop and backed them up in the hard disk and both were stolen. Back then cloud storage and WiFi connection were luxuries. I’m very old btw. They even had the guts to eat some kienyeji chicken that I had left marinating, cooked ugali and left dirty dishes.  That was a hint that apart from being thieves, they were also fangi smokers. The only important asset they left behind was the bed, which was also broken. I did not really understand or know what activities had happened in my house,...

Baby mama.

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I had just bailed out one of my Gs, yobiz, out of the government “air bnb.” If you know you know, if you don't, well you can forget about it. The way he kept thanking me after I had got him out, if I was a lady, I could have died from that overdose of appreciation and attention, but hey, who am I to talk.  Anyway, I just had to laugh at him at how silly he looked. He looked disheveled, with just one croc on his foot, his socks muddy, and his t-shirt stretched like that of a lactating mother. He was still paranoid of his surroundings and he was adamant to tell me how it all went down on the way, till we reached his place he said that's when and where he will tell me.  I didn't push it, so we continued on our way so that he could tell me the story and hopefully we could brainstorm on some other important issues like, how are we going to negotiate with clients in order to clinch the next deal? I waited until he freshened up, then got some coffee in him first before I then aske...